phikus

( Sometimes I make dumb decisions... )

On a different note, I'm going to have a blast in my acting for animators class! The first day was spent doing some acting warm ups and improv games.

I'm excited to learn about philosophy and art history in my renaissance class. Yesterday we talked about Socrates, Plato, and Democritus and the evolution from mythology to logic and true knowledge.

After my encounter with Mr. Alan the Liar Clown the information about the Sophists and rhetoric rung true for me. He was definitely using his words to get what he wanted. Nice job man. I suppose there is a reason for written contracts. His follow-through on his verbal agreement was faulty. I'm going to be sore about this for awhile I think. I want to just let it go and get over it, but it struck me so deeply for some reason. It makes for a good story at least.

I have a room to live in for the summer in the inner sunset district. It is close to the N-line so it should be easy to get to school and whatnot. The landlords have some strict rules like:

NO VISITORS, EVER!
BUY YOUR OWN TOILET PAPER!

At least no one will be using my toilet paper or having parties and disturbing me. Plus, I HAVE MY OWN ROOM! It feels nice.

It will do nicely for the summer.



Which means Cindy isn't moving out here yet. August is the plan for that. I hope this summer goes according to plan. I have a painting from last semester to finish, my short animated film to finish, classes to do well in, and workshops to attend. We shall see how it plays out.

I had my first night of only 1 hour of sleep. I started working on my homework for Friday morning on Thursday afternoon and didn't finish (or give up really) until after 5:00 am. It wasn't that hard since I had a Mountain Dew and two cups of coffee. I think I did okay on the assignment, but there were two other students who had nice compositions, poses, and details that made their drawings have more life.

I have started an art blog here: http://jeremiahpance.blogspot.com/ for those of you who would like to see my progress. I would like to see my progress as well because sometimes it's easy to forget how you have improved because "there's always someone cooler than you" as Ben Folds said.

Last night I saw a concert with Bettina, my fellow animation student. She is a fan of Zoe Keating, who plays the cello and composes with layering and loops on a computer. The show last night was in a church with a large pipe organ. A man named Charles Rus played the organ and it was amazing. I've never seen a show like that before in my life. I don't know that I've experienced a pipe organ in person before. Maybe once or twice, but I don't remember when. That is a powerful instrument and I think the power of music touches us in the same place religious ideas do.

Every time I go to a concert my kindling desires to play music get fanned into a bigger flame. As I've complained about before I'm sure, sometimes lately I get frustrated and question the industry and occupation I am pursuing. I do love art, but at 27 I am struggling to learn a lot of the basic art and principles that might have come easier when I was younger. I know that I have talent for seeing and reproducing things, but constructing a drawing from the inside out is the skill I must acquire. The end goal is to be able to create a believable drawing that has life and personality. What I really want to do is make films, tell stories, and act. Being able to create drawings with the exact gesture, expression, and movement will allow me to create a more compelling performance in the story on the screen. My hurdle now is creating the habit of my performance in the act of drawing.

I am very much looking forward to coming home and relaxing for awhile.

My brain feels like it checked out for a few days.

As it stands now, I feel okay. Here is a list of things

I oil painted for the first time today.
I completed a satisfactory amount of homework (compared to hardly any over the weekend).
Cindy was planning on visiting me this weekend, but she waited too long and plane tickets are too expensive (so we might just have to wait to see each other until I go back to Salt Lake City). Which will be on or around May 16th. I will probably take the train again. It's cheap and chill (and also arrives in SLC at the bum crack of dawn).
I went the the gym tonight, hooray.
I spoke to a fellow student who is graduating at the end of this semester. His thoughts and plans about his prospective future wasn't very reassuring. Now that he has an animated film under his belt and a bunch of experience, the job hunt is beginning. I have two years left until I graduate.
My roommate situation has stabilized. We're all just riding it out until the end now.
I bought a new backpack that (as my friend Bettina put it) has increased my quality of life exponentially. I knew my old backpack was uncomfortable, but this one makes it seem like I was wearing an iron maiden on my back.
I actually went to the Golden Gate Bridge the other day. It was nice.

I miss Utah. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I miss playing music. I miss Cindy.
I like art and animation. I like my friends out here (when I have time to see them). I like the weather out here (usually).

I lied, this ended up being a 14 minute post.

There are good days, and there are bad days. Often one follows the other. Yesterday was good. I felt good. Today was less good.

I watched this video:

http://vodpod.com/watch/1437584-a-twitter-cartoon-to-mock-your-existence

I'm tired and hope that I can manage myself into being more on top of my homework.

My poor little self-esteem doesn't always cooperate with my desires to accomplish what I've set forth to do. I've complained about this before, and I feel dumb doing so, but it's a routine that keeps occurring. Such is life I suppose. If breaking habits were easy, we would all be doing it, right?

I should probably sleep and eat in a more balanced proportion to the amount of running I've been doing the last two days.

Also, my eyelids feel sunburned for some reason.

This week my lesson has been that just putting in the time doesn't always facilitate good work. I'm still figuring out the best work method to do the projects for my Drawing (realistically) from imagination class. I'm a little OCD I think and focus in so much on little details that I lose sight of the bigger project and bigger picture. This is something I hope to correct by the end of this semester.

I slept 4 hours last night and felt pretty hosed after spending so much time in one day on one assignment that was frustrating because it took me almost all day to get into the right headspace to efficiently work on the assignment. It would be smart to start working on homework a few days before it's due. I think I've complained about this already. My teacher did give me some advice on a better working method so I don't waste as much time.

The good thing today was hanging out with my compatriot in the animation program, Bettina. We chilled at the park, ate sweet baked goods, hung out at the beach, then watched some PeeWee's Playhouse, various internet funnies, and old Sesame Street animations. She also made some delicious food. It's nice to end the day better than it began. I hope to break up the homework grind and roommate annoyance more in the future.

I didn't get to talk to Cindy tonight. That is sad.

Tomorrow I go to the Legion of Honor museum with my head drawing class and teacher who will give us a walking tour/lecture of the artwork. He did it last semester for my figure studio class and it was really cool. I may have forgot a lot of the names and details, maybe I'll remember more this time.

Art is hard. I don't know why this is a revelation.

I miss playing music.

EDIT: Cindy called me :)

My fellow animation student, Bettina, has created a plan for my facial and head hair.

( curious? )

It could happen... maybe.

So, first day of school synopsis. My head drawing class will basically be the same format and ideas as my figure studio class but we will focus on the head. Go figure... er, go head... It's humbling to remember the point you were at in the past and realize you haven't maintained those skills completely. Good think I have 15 more weeks to improve again.

All the while this is going to help me draw better, which will in turn help me communicate my ideas better, animate better by thinking more about the acting than the drawing (I hope, but I need to get into cartooning more from this fine art endeavor). These will help me tell the stories I want to tell and help me visually design all of the elements of the story. This is a rather demanding endeavor when all I had really set forth to accomplish by coming to this school was to be an actor with a pencil. I am happy to learn all I can about everything, but I am just feeling a bit overwhelmed at the moment. I just need to work on each little bit by bit by bit. One thing at a time and one foot in front of the other.

I had a blast here in San Francisco with Bettina, Heidi, Angela, and the rest of the Corner Laughers whose show was yet again enjoyable. I recorded two songs from the show on Saturday with my video camera, hope to get them uploaded for the enjoyment of those who would like them. If any of you would rather I not upload them and/or would like to upload them to a site of your choosing, please let me know.

I thoroughly enjoyed the Retrospective/Interview/Clip Show/Q&A with The State, thanks to Heidi. Oh to be in a prolific, smart, and productive improv/sketch/comedy/film group. I guess I can always have a hobby. I haven't had any experience actually writing material, just riffing and improv-ing. I would like to think I could be good at it, but as The State expresses (and is the case with most creative endeavors), quantity will lead to quality. The more you do, the more likely you are to come up with something good. I need to use this process to come up with my next animation idea for my class.

Well I didn't do a whole lot of exercise today (other than walking across the city), and I didn't do much additional creative stuff (other than my drawing class which is more academic than creative anyway), and I didn't write in my journal (not including this one). I guess things even out pretty well. I even talked to Cindy for almost 45 minutes and took a little music-induced nap. I didn't accomplish any homework really, but I did shoot some zombies with my roommate. That counts, right?

Too late for the flightlipdub.com contest, but here 'tis

I have uploaded a bunch of my drawings from last semester.

From Figure Studio 2008

Peruse if you choose! Be warned, there is more nudity via charcoal pencils...

After drawing all day yesterday and animating all day today I feel like I will be able to complete my projects without having to pull any all nighters.... as long as I keep up this pace.

I slept in a little later than I wanted today and didn't start animating until after noon. I spent awhile fussing with my animatic on the crazy program we have to use at school before diving into animating again. The first part of the semester I spent my animating time in the grad lab, but lately I have been using the normal lab because the grad lab has become somewhat a socializing corner and it's hard for me to concentrate in that environment.

I got a lot done today, but felt my head getting a little fuzzy toward the end. Fighting between wanting to make stellar animation and getting it done on time. Such is the life of an animator on commercial productions as well.

I'm kind of enjoying this bombardment of work I have to do, it is going to be nice to have a break but I don't want to get bored.

I have much to do in the next two weeks. About 40 or so seconds of animation and another drawing for my figure studio class. Not to mention my comprehensive final for my history of VFX class.

Things have been rolling along relatively smoothly. The Thanksgiving break and trip to SLC was very fun. I ate lots of food, spent good time with Cindy, and helped with the filming of (and rolled my many times sprained ankle in) another Man vs. Pumpkin movie the McAllister men make every year.

It took a couple days after the break to remember how to draw and animate again (my brain really took a vacation) but now I feel somewhat rested and able to accomplish my challenges!

I decided to bite the bullet and stay in my dorm for spring in order to get my deposit back (hopefully), and avoid having to find and furnish my own apartment. Plus Cindy wants to move out here and this will give us time to plan to re-cohabitate.

SF Friends! I will take a train out of this town on the 21st. I would like to visit at least once before I go back to Salt Land. I know it's the end of many of our semesters, but let us try to visit!

Salt Lake Friends, I'll see you soon-ish!

Friends in other places! I'm not going to be where you are! Except maybe a possible road trip to Portland, but Adam isn't a livejournaler.

P.S. I have been listening to the Animation Podcast. Look it up if you like animation. A current Disney animator interviews the great animators. It's awesome.

I still think I want to be an animator... I hope I can get good enough at this craft to find work. I currently draw about 50% as much as I need to every day.

Now I'm just rambling.

This weekend was a lot of awesome. Cindy and I went to the El Ten Eleven show at the Makeout Room. It was cool to see them again. The drummer guy even remembered me from their show in Salt Lake City. It was also nice to see a concert where I could stand the whole time and not get tired because it wasn't ridiculously long with many bands.. we also got there after the opening band already played. We found a japanese place to eat dinner after I enlightened Cindy to Bob's donuts.

Saturday we ate lunch at Herbivore and went to the Animation show at the Red Vic. The animation selections were pretty cool. There were some silly ones and some really good ones. I noticed that is was only presented by Mike Judge without Don Hertzfeldt who has co-presented it in the past. I was saddened and I think the choices of animation were affected. I don't know of it was worse or not, just different. There was a healthy mix of 2D, 3D, and stopmotion.

Afterwards we went to Golden Gate Park to try and find a Letterbox scavenger hunt stamp thing. We found the location but it wasn't there! Just finding it was fun though. Next we ate dinner at Jay's Cheesesteaks for delicious seitan delights. Cindy wanted to have ice cream cake for her birthday so she ordered two vegan ice cream cakes which were enjoyed at Angela's place with a lovely group of people. You know who you are. We played fun games (hoopla, pictionary, taboo, and salsa). It was quite enjoyable.

Today Cindy and I went to Alcatraz. I love to ride ferries! It was cool to see and hear (by way of audio tour) the interesting things that happened in that icon of an island and prison. I'm uploading pictures on facebook. We finished off with Golden Era and walked around a bit before I escorted her to the airport (to the Oakland Airport Bart stop anyway). She's been wanting to get back together ever since I left Utah and I have had a struggle with it since I had thought it was over. I finally felt like I could I'm ready to try it again. The long distance thing is hard, but she is motivated to move out here to be with me. I'm stuck in housing for spring semester and I'm also going to apply for a summer internship with Disney, so I don't know about the logistics. Anyway, that is the scoop.

I'm really tired from everything and I have school in the morn.

Today I felt peppy for some reason. It could be the arizona green tea I drank last night and this morning. I had no class today, so I spent it working on my Rembrandt copy, going to a drawing workshop, watching 2001: A Space Odyssey, and making a thumbnail storyboard for my final animation project.

I need to finish the copy tomorrow so I hope that doesn't take all day. I felt successful in the workshop, drawing the same pose for a couple hours. I'm getting better at the method of drawing my figure studio teacher has bestowed upon me. It just takes a long time. In a couple hours I got half of the basic shading done on the model.

My bus pass has expired, and I haven't bought a new one yet so I walked everywhere I needed to go today. I enjoyed it, and found a good place to eat on the way. It was a cheesesteak place that had veggie burgers, so I got one. It was super delicious with sauteed onions and mushrooms and I think it even had guacamole, for under 5 bucks!

I enjoyed the film, I hadn't seen it in a long time. It is a little hard to watch with the slow pace, but really interesting. The ending is very strange. I don't even want to guess at the logic of what actually happened. I know Kubrick didn't provide an explanation either, he just wants people to get what they get out of it.

I like my story idea, but I'm not sure if it is doable for this project. I will try to come up with a few more to give me some options.

Cindy comes to visit this weekend. It should be fun and I need the break from school stuff.... even though I've had pretty decent breaks. I want more! I still don't know about this long distance thing. We are still in a sort of holding pattern.

I was all vamped up to post something, then I started reading everyone else's entries and now I'm too tired... which means SYNOPSIS TIME!

I spent this week not working enough on my animation of a cute little flour sack and a little more than necessary time on my figure studio assignment (copying a rembrandt painting). For some reason I wasn't able to stress out too much. School has finally knocked me over the head enough times for me to be a little numb to it.

I had a blast at the Allen Clapp/Corner Laughers/Major Labels show. As with every concert I've seen out here, it rekindled my desire to make and play music. I need my acoustic guitar, to write a few songs, and to hit some open mics somewhere round here.

I'm going to be Bob Ross for Halloween.

I was so hungry this evening, I had to spend the whole rest of the day after my 6 hour figure studio class on my animation and didn't have time to eat. Walking home I stumbled upon a little shop where I bought a Shawarma that was a bit too spicy, but I was too hungry to care. Now I must sleep so I can shoot and turn in my animation before class tomorrow... which means you can watch it on facebook.

I love sleep and food!

This week was awesomely draining.

I finished my Orson Welles black and white photo copy and my teacher liked it so much that it is hanging in the fine art building's lobby. Woohoo!

Now onto the next assignment... copying a Rembrandt painting in charchoal.

I fixed up my chicken animation. It will be or is on facebook depending on when you read this.

Last night I took a well deserved break from school projects and went to eat finally with Angela at a restaurant near the sweet theater in the Haight Ashbury area. They play awesome movies from the present and the past. We saw the Dark Knight. It was good, but I paid more attention to the techniques of the film this time instead of being blown away by the story and the acting. A few times I noticed the cuts between camera positions in dialogue scenes where the action didn't match up exactly. This happens all the time in movies, but usually it isn't too apparent. The food we ate beforehand was awesome... afterwards we watched a bunch of Looney Tunes at my request. It has been a long time since I have watched any of those cartoons, but I remembered them immediately. Good stuff, but some the gags, conventions, and stories are obviously outdated.

Today I went to the Legion of Honor with a group of classmates and my teacher from my figure studio class. Our teacher took us on a guided tour of Renaissance painters and paintings. I learned a lot and it was pretty amazing to see the old beautiful works of art. I want to take the follow up class, figure studio 2, so I hope I have enough electives in my program to do so.

I haven't been able to make it to the improv workshop for two weeks. I'm hankering to go again! Maybe next week.

I am going to come back to Salt Lake City for Thanksgiving thanks to Cindy helping me with a plane ticket.

There is a cook/bake off happening tomorrow evening for the students in my building. I'd like to make something, but right now I am not motivated. Perhaps a vegan chocolate cake? We'll see.

I need to work on things, but I will probably relax more instead.

So I've been in San Francisco at the Academy of Art for just over five weeks now. I am sort of in a groove. Seems like I need to spend more and more time on my projects. I am enjoying them. Right now I am quite tired.

Week in a nutshell:

Working hard on my hollywood photo copy in charchoal to have my teacher question how much work I put into it. I am doing Orson Welles as a young handsome lad.

Spending many hours animating an actual character acting.

Seeing Wall-E finally, it was really good and I almost cried a little.

Having a fun night out until 3am last night.

Celebrating Heidi's Derfday this evening with Jen (who I just met) and yummy vegan food and ice cream. I might have to go buy a harmonica as well since I don't have my guitars.

Sleep...

I had fun yesterday... way better than homework was going to the improv class again and then trekking to San Rafael to visit Heidi. We rented Song of the South and tried our darndest to feel racist, but it really wasn't that shocking. Maybe we are already racist so nothing stuck out in our minds (doubtful). I also exposed her to Harold Lloyd and Buster Keaton. Unfortunately, the only video the store had was Buster's talkies, which sucked. I had heard that sound ruined his career, I just didn't know it was THAT bad. I'm going to be sad about that for awhile.

Before watching stuff we went to eat at the Broken Drum. I had a delicious veggie burger and locally brewed beer. Afterwards we wanted donuts, but the shop was closed so we got ice cream instead. Even though it is kind of far, the bus ride home was a snap. I can go right from downtown San Rafael to a couple blocks from my house on the same bus.

Today I slept in necessarily because my roommate was up yet again watching a movie... at 12:30. He does watch interesting things... but I like to watch things on MY time schedule. He was watching a documentary about steroids and how America is an idiot. After I got up and whatnot I did a smidgen of homework but needed a few things from various stores. I went to get some art supplies, a print of the photo I am copying (by drawing), and some food. I also stopped at Guitar Center and played for awhile. I do want to buy a new electric guitar. Maybe it will be a gift to myself for completing my first two semesters here. I played a stratocaster and a PRS SE.. I think that's what it was called. There were both nice. The PRS had a thicker neck and flatter fret board which was a little strange but I think I might like that more than the strat style.

Now I am home and my roommate is at work so I can hopefully get some good homework time in.

This weekend was fun. Friday night I watched Dumbo with Angela. It has some great animation, sight gags, and songs, but the story is disjointedly connected by the famous accidental drunk binge. Saturday I went again to the improv class. There was a different instructor who was equally as good. I hung out with the improv peeps at a bar and then to dinner at a sweet bbq skewer place. It was fun and delicious and I didn't do enough homework...

Sunday I actually did some homework and then went to the Academy of Science with Angela. They have a lot of neat exhibits. My favorites were the albino alligator, the story of Lonely George the great tortoise, the bio-dome rainforest with cute little amphibians suction-cupped to the sides of their plastic cages, and the creepy dioramas of African wildlife. Before the museum we went to lunch and to the beach where the shuttle was. It was really nice to see the ocean. It makes me feel good just being near it. I finished the night off with more homework. I studied about the evolution of what is now blue-screen until the wee hours of the night for a quiz monday which I aced!

We watched Snow White in my History of visual effects class. I don't think I have watched that movie since I was a child, but I remembered almost everything. Grumpy really has a chip on his should about "women's wiles". It made me wonder what his history is. What a great film though. The story is beautiful, sad, and happily cliche.

After class I started work on my third animation assignment (which is now uploaded on facebook). Later I met Angela for awesome Thai dinner at Neecha and then a Spoon concert at The Fillmore. The Heavenly States opened and were good but not too memorable. Only one of their songs made me feel excited about them. Spoon were great. I enjoyed them a lot, but my achy knees made the experience somewhat less enjoyable. Too much walking around this hilly city and not enough stretching makes my legs sad.

Tuesday I worked on my figure studio assignment to lay down the construction lines of a black and white photo from the Golden Age of Hollywood. I then went to a character animation workshop to get some tips on my assignment. It was helpful and made my animation better. That evening was a seminar with a few guys talking about how they got from graduating at the academy to working in the industry. They were illustrators and concept designers, but it was still interesting. I enjoyed hearing their stories. Illustration sounds pretty fun to me. I've gone to a couple clothed figure drawing workshops and there are mostly illustration students. I want to become a better illustrator, but I still love storytelling and acting through movement.

Wednesday was more figure studio homework and that workshop. I don't think much else happened.

Thursday is my figure studio class... 6 hours of some lecture, a drawing demo, and lots of drawing. After that I wanted to go to the drawing for animators workshop, but the time had moved to later in the evening. I just worked on my animation some more. I'm glad I did, because I didn't finish drawing it until 11:30 pm. Yesterday was a long day... plus when I got home my roommate was watching Heroes. I've never seen it before so it was kind of fun after such a long day, but I didn't really want to watch tv for an hour before bed.

This caused me to sleep in later than I had intended and I still needed to shoot my animation before class at noon. I made it to the lab and discovered that my animation worked just as good, or better, than I had planned. Hooray! Afterwards I went to another clothed figure drawing workshop which was held by one of the most awesome guys I've met at the academy. He was so passionate about drawing and having fun that I couldn't help but feel jazzed to draw. He made me feel more attracted to the idea of becoming an illustrator as well. The thought of working on drawing so much that you can draw pretty much anything you want is a very attractive idea. Draw, draw, draw, everything, all the time... that's pretty much the key for any artist it seems. Practice the craft all the time to absorb life around you. This is something I still haven't mastered in my life; self discipline to develop the habits to perpetuate increasing my skill levels. My goal is to do this here. I've got a lot of bad habits to change or erase.

After the workshop tonight I went over to my classmate's place for a BBQ. There were some other animation students that I know there and other random people. It was fun, but it was outside so I got really cold. I could actually see my breath. Luckily one of my friends brought me a blanket and later a girl's coat. It was funny and fun.

On another note, Cindy is coming to visit me next weekend. She has expressed her desire to stay in a relationship with me. I'm not sure what I want and if it would even work under the current circumstances. That's the short story.

I felt like posting my animation assignments thus far. They are on facebook, so find them if you dare!